Lacking Skills

You know what really grinds my gears..  The fact that pretty much anyone over the fucking age of 16 can get a drivers license.  This tornado of anger has been building for years and finally burst, like Paul Rueben (Pee Wee) in an adult peep show, when I was hit by a fucking cab the other day.  Yeah,  you heard me right!  Hedge is walking down the street, and the next thing he knows he is moving in a different direction while laying on the hood of a fucking yellow car.  So there I am, about 10 feet from my original walking path.  Once the dumb fuck realizes I am not his hood ornament he slams on the breaks.  I, with my ninja skills, fly off the hood and was able to stay on my feet.  (I was extremly impressed with my cat like reflexis)  So there I am in a staring contest with the cab driver.  Mind you, he doesn’t even get out of the fucking cab.  I proceed to walk over to the driver side door and tap on the window and gave him the motion to roll down the window.  He looked like he just pissed himself.  I guess I would have pissed myself too if I hit a oompa loompa.  So there I am yelling at this guy and he doesn’t know what to do.  Once I realize I am fine, and have used the word fuck in every possible manner, I turn and proceed on to work.  Moral of the story..  If everyone carried a gun, these things wouldn’t happen so often!

H-Train..